::: Near Date

Less than a month to go.
I hope it marks my new destiny.
Im excited, thrilled, happy and impatient.
Yet I feel more lost, not ready, scared and trembled.

But they say true love is not easy.
I know Im finding one.
Finding the right ONE.


| not easy |

::: Unspoken Uphill

Life seems like an arduous journey recently - with self monologue becoming more negative and destructive than ever.

Im being too tough on myself, and tougher towards others, for that, Im sorry.

This phase will end soon, I hope. Hence do not worry..


| burdensome |

::: The Not-Sorry

Going stronger. 

Because I have nothing to lose. 

Got so much to achieve. 

Done enough to please.

Wont care if no one ever feel sorry.

Because, again, I have nothing to lose.

| forward |

::: Free

Hello Malaysia!

| the smell of our home |

::: A Break

Blessed

Alhamdulillah

| Work hard, play hard |

::: Cukupkah, cukuplah

Cukupkah

Amal kita

Sedekah kita

Ibadah kita

Iman kita

Konon cita-cita

Menjenguk rumah Yang Esa

Namun sedikit tak ada gusar

Membikin noda dosa

Cukuplah

Jangan ditambah bakul-bakul dosa

Sudahlah

Sudahlah

| cukup-cukupkan |

::: For Things We Cant Say, Write

| alhamdulillah |

::: Secebis Dosa

Near end of my 30 years journey.

I have been well blessed by The Almighty Allah
I have been showered by His magical happiness
I have been granted with things that I dreamt of
I have been much enlightened by His enormous guidance

Nonetheless, I know..
I have a dark history
I had committed big sins
I had walked across His boundaries
I had forgotten Him in many ways

In which I always regret
For what I have done unto myself
That distanced me from His better way

We always know that Allah is watching
But why do we still commit such wrongdoings?
Do we forget what is heaven or hell?
Or do we just live to satisfy the greed and shaytan?

Upon Him I pray
For our soul to be cleaned and aware
That He is watching
All for the goods He will redeem
And for those sins, we definitely need to pay


| in a painful memory, i wish to never stay |

::: Life Lessons

As I get older, I become quieter. 

When surrounded by certain people, I choose to remain silent when things get dramatic or critical. It doesnt mean I refuse to discuss on that respective issues. Neither do I feel I am on the losing side. 

I am just plain tired of being in life crisis. That sorts of flow used to look complex and interesting back then. But now, nah, with too much on my plates, I would say I have had enough of those. Really, enough.

For now, let me just be alone. I am happy this way. I am free. I now hate personal commitment. I choose to concentrate on my career. I need not to worry about how to make everyone happy. I focus more on myself. I travel more. I learn more. I pick who I share my personal life with. I can giggle to the littlest joke. I may cry whenever I want. 

I am free. Free of burdening boundaries. 

I am free. I am me.

| the end |

::: Departed

Little steps that bring me ahead

And the light that show me some guide

Some perfect men that keep me sane

Flawless women that are there and then

Thank you family, friends and strangers

May we meet again soon :)

x

| moving away isnt any easy, but at least, im done with it|