::: 2022 and its near end

It is near the end of 2022. 

It really goes by at a blink of an eye.

This year started with hope - loadssss of it. And I thought this year will end with a stronger vibe.

But I was wrong. Mehhhhh.

Tests and challenges are in fact signs of Allah's reminder as well as blessings.

Nothing good comes easy, I believe.

Allah made a person, K, came into my life - but it was short lived.

Promises were broken, memories were dark.

But I am gonna look at this from a positive perspective.

I know I do not lose anything. 

I am on the winning end - big win.

He came at a good time, really.  And I thought I was ready. Yet no, I was actually never ready.

Again, I know now that it was a test from Him the al-Mighty.

To remind me that I should always rely on Him.

- during the goods and the bads, the ups and the downs.

La hawla wala quwwata illa billah...

I may have no shoulder to cry on sometimes, but I always have a ground to put my head and shed my tears on.

Because only Allah is the ultimate Listener.

May the end of 2022, marks a good start of the upcoming years. I am all ready.

Embarking a new journey of freedom and self-love - inshaAllah.

| May Allah removes this testing sorrow from me |

:: 2020 and COVID-19

Assalammualaikum and hello everyone.
It has been a while. A long while.

2020 kicked in nearly 5 months ago, with its big challange.
Everybody is fighting COVID-19 around the globe.
So am I. So does everyone.

I am doing okay, if you may ask.
Tough time as a frontliner.

Nonetheless, this is a great experience.
Seeing how unity can keep us going and ignorance breaks us apart.
We really are capable of anything.
It is just a matter of efforts and tolerance.

Ive been on daily exposure for the past 2 weeks.
Been swabbed 2 times, Alhamdulillah both were negatives.

Tomorrow I will begin my 1 week of quarantine leave before starting another long roster afterwards.

May all is well. InshaAllah.


| we can do this |

::: Signing Off

Esok, the long journey begins.
Doakan aku selamat pergi.
Semoga juga akan kembali.
Doakan semuanya baik-baik saja.

Apalah sangat yang nak ditinggalkan.
Tak luak hidup.
Tak luak perasaan.
Tak luak apa saja.

Allah kan ada.


| you are not worthy of this space |

::: IMARET #KERANA KITA BERSAUDARA

Some of you may have already know that I was involved in IMARET Humanitarian Relief Mission to Cox's Bazar Bangladesh for The Rohingyans earlier this year. The journey was an eye opening.

As of now, the mission is still ongoing. IMARET is still deploying teams to Cox's Bazar fortnightly, bringing aids to the needful.

However, as another saddening news emerged over this last 2 weeks, clearly our neighbouring county is in need of our assistance too.

Hence, IMARET is sending our volunteers over to Sulawesi, to show them support and to offer aids wherever possible, mainly in the medical services.


++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


IMARET team’s report for the day on 5/10/2018:

From mobile clinic we have moved on to setting up a field hospital to help those in dire need of medical attention

Thank you for the donations raised so far: RM120,000! We still need more for our relief efforts.

SULAWESI EARTHQUAKE RELIEF

Help Us to Help Them
Charity Begins With You

Help us to help them by donating: 

Persatuan Perubatan Islam Malaysia
CIMB: 8600703709
Swift code: CTBBMYKL
Reference: Sulawesi

#IMARET4Sulawesi #keranakitabersaudara #charitybeginswithyou

| kerana kita bersaudara |

::: Lang Leav Sea Of Strangers

The best so far.

| reality check |

::: IMARET HUMANITARIAN RELIEF MISSION, COX'S BAZAR

I have been in Cox's Bazar, Bangladesh (to be specific in the Kutupalong Refugees Camp) for Rohingyan Humanitarian Relief Mission since 12th April 2018, representing IMARET, in collaboration with Malaysian Field Hospital (MFH) and OBATHelpers. There is so much to share.

Will update once time allows.
Anyway, Malaysians, be grateful, very grateful!

| charity begins with you |

::: To...

To live and to love

To fear and to bear

To die and to smile

++++++++++

I am heading to Bangladesh soon

May Allah ease the path

| ending soon |

::: Nikmat Yang Didustakan

Ingat 5 perkara
Sebelum 5 perkara

MashaAllah this sentence itself is beyond haunting

Setiap kesakitan datangnya dari Allah
Untuk mengingatkan aku tentang dosa
Tentang mati
Tentang neraka

Harap-harap Allah pelihara
Daripada segala kemungkaran

Tidak dia menguji
Sesuatu yang tidak mampu aku tempuhi


| la tahzan |

::: The Colours

Life aint just black and white.

Neither it is just rainbows and candies.

++++++++++++++++++++

Cant wait for next January.

Hello clouds, wish me well and happy.

++++++++++++++++++++

Maybe we shall change our aim.

Not just to travel abroad once or twice every year.

Lets aim for Umrah every one or two years. 

Shall we?

++++++++++++++++++++

Holy Land. MashaAllah. 

It is beyond inifinite peace. Tak boleh digambarkan sekadar dengan kata-kata.

You have to go there yourself to experience all these unexplainable emotions.

Mencium hajar aswad, solat di Rawdah. 

Tiada sedetik pun bimbang perihal dunia.

Setiap masa mengejar-ngejar pahala.

Subhanallah.

I swear that was the best 'holiday' I ever had in my entire life.

You could give me million visits to any places on earth, but I swear nothing is ever better than seeing Kaabah with your own two eyes.

I hope I can be there again, maybe in 2018 / 2019?

InshaAllah. Jom sama-sama pasang niat.

| Lets do this. Aim for it. Work for it. |

::: Mortal

If we cant be supportive or positive towards others' intentions and plans, it is wise for us to keep quiet and stay out of it. Our negative remarks is the last thing any person would need during any tasks. 

You can never be perfect in everything. If you ever feel 'I am always right, because I have been through it', you are definitely wrong and selfish! Sedangkan bulu badan setiap kita ini pun tak sama panjang, and you expect us to be similar? 

You really need to revisit your self reflection. Muhasabah. Bersangka baik. Berkata baik. It starts within yourself.

| learning life |

::: Soul Searching

Assalammualaikum...

| for Allah |

::: Confession

It has been a while since I experience this feeling.
Of being.. Hmmm
No, not loved.
But beyond...

I cant describe.

There are boundaries
That we know will forever exist
That put quote like 'loving doesnt necessary mean having'
Sounded as painful as hell

But those eyes...
Those words...
Those frequency...
Are beyond love

We crave for attention
For each other
We feel complete

This feeling that we have
May one day grows too much
But we will keep it just within us
No one shall let it be seen

No, not the feeling of loved
But beyond...


| midlife crisis |

::: Time Off

Time spent well

| free |

::: Too Secured

There shall be no insecurity

When we hold tight to loyalty

There shall be no jealousy

When we hold tight to independency

| capability |

::: A Hero

Independent, as hell.

|  i am my own hero |

::: Near Date

Less than a month to go.
I hope it marks my new destiny.
Im excited, thrilled, happy and impatient.
Yet I feel more lost, not ready, scared and trembled.

But they say true love is not easy.
I know Im finding one.
Finding the right ONE.


| not easy |

::: Unspoken Uphill

Life seems like an arduous journey recently - with self monologue becoming more negative and destructive than ever.

Im being too tough on myself, and tougher towards others, for that, Im sorry.

This phase will end soon, I hope. Hence do not worry..


| burdensome |

::: The Not-Sorry

Going stronger. 

Because I have nothing to lose. 

Got so much to achieve. 

Done enough to please.

Wont care if no one ever feel sorry.

Because, again, I have nothing to lose.

| forward |

::: Free

Hello Malaysia!

| the smell of our home |

::: A Break

Blessed

Alhamdulillah

| Work hard, play hard |