Nobody ever say that healing is easy. It is not a one off journey.
This patterns of emotional recovery is perhaps similar to a chronic pain spectrum.
We are bound to go to and fro relapses and remissions, visiting old wound or pain, then drying it off temporarily until a point where we can bear with the background threshold of discomfort, in order to sustain a good-enough maintenance of daily activities.
The same applies to healing from a broken relationship. Human relationship, to be exact.
There are days that we believe that things happen for the better. Some days we whine because we know we do not deserve to be hurt like that. But to err is human.
We swallow the hardship on good days. But nonetheles, when life seems like shit, we can only indulge the darkness of past memories.
Maybe, we dont actually miss the person that had left us. We miss the good times that made us smile. The potentials, the fantasies and the future projections, are embedded by our own hope, our own dreams, not solely because of that temporary individual.
Again, maybe, we need to remind ourselves - do we not recall the time we suffered emotionally, when they refused to be accountable of the misery they caused us? Do we forget how painful it was to wait for uncertainties? Do we not remember how they could simply turned away just to avoid vulnerability?
If they dare to so upon us, leaving us in the lowest pitfalls intentionally, do we still think that such person deserves the slightest unconditional love from us?
Love doesnt need to be begged.
Love is supposed to be built and embraced together by two different souls that share similar principles, beliefs and efforts. Two souls that is willing to meet halfways on difficult differences, yet agree to disagree respectfully on certain matters.
Such, is love.
Remeber, love doesnt need to be begged.
~ one step at a time ~
